Think for a moment about your best friend or the person who knows you better than you know yourself. You trust their voice, their advice, and their take on the world. You believe their opinion and voice to be a source of truth. Now, imagine that same voice was nothing but critical. Imagine that voice constantly reminding you that you are not good enough, smart enough, or skilled enough to become the person you’ve always dreamed of becoming. How long would you listen to that voice?

Hopefully, that “friend” would no longer take up space rent-free in your head.

Let’s shift gears for a second.

I want you to take a minute and think about the way you talk to yourself. I want you to think about how critical you are of yourself. Are those words kind, supportive, and encouraging? Or are they critical, harsh, and even discouraging? Far too often, it’s not our best friends that are most critical of us—it’s ourselves. Many of us were raised to believe that the best way to motivate and succeed is to be our worst critics. Forget the nice supportive words of affirmation. No. What works is that persistent voice that reminds you that your best is never good enough. Think about those words and thoughts. Would you say those exact words to your best friend, spouse, or kids?

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If they’re negative and discouraging, you better not be.

But the truth is that these inner voices of self-doubt, self-condemnation, self-deprecation, etc., keep us from seeing our most authentic selves in each of our uniqueness.

But how do we turn that voice down? How do we dial back the harmful noise, self-condemnation, self-doubt, and counter-productive attitude we constantly listen to? Thanks to our relatively new understanding of neuroplasticity, we now know that we actively and successfully change how we think.

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Recognize the Voice.

Recognize the tone and volume of that voice, what it’s trying to tell us, and the lies it is feeding us. The first and most effective strategy for defeating lies and finding the truth is identifying which is which. You know exactly what it would sound like if a close friend or family member started bringing us down. We must learn to recognize that same tone coming from our minds.

Click Here to Learn About the Benefits of a Positive Mindset

Employ Some Simple Mindfulness.

If you’re not entirely clear on how the practice of mindfulness works, it’s really quite simple. Take notice of the world around you and your reaction to it. Notice how factors outside of your control are, in fact controlling you. Remember that you have thoughts, but you are not your thoughts. For example, go back to a moment when you failed. How did it feel? How did you react and respond? Maybe you thought to yourself, “wow, I am a failure!” However, just because you feel the weight and effects of failure at that moment does not mean you are a failure. You have failed, but you are not a failure.

Click Here to Learn About Mindfulness Techniques

Invite Your Community In To Help.

We need to connect with other people to help us turn down the narrative of lies and turn up the volume on truth. We need people to speak words of positive affirmation in our lives, to remind us how valuable and wonderful we are and that we offer a unique perspective on the world that no one else has. We are all navigating something, and we all need help with it. Positive affirmation can sometimes feel awkward, but the outcome far outweighs the momentary awkwardness.

Click Here to Learn About Establishing a Community