Working Through Anxiety Starts With These Two Key Practices
I recently listened to someone talking about anxiety. The more I listened, the more I cringed. This person spoke as if anxiety could be wished away by just thinking differently. But I have seen, first hand, the effects of debilitating anxiety--how it affects the person and everyone around them. To be clear, I don't believe this person was purposely oversimplifying or disingenuous. I believe they honestly thought they were helping. Still, they missed the mark on defining anxiety and how a person can successfully work through those terrifying moments. It was similar to giving a person with a broken leg the suggestion to just walk it off without understanding the physical and mental distress it causes.
Anxiety is a big umbrella word we throw around a lot, and it can mean a variety of things. It can evidence itself as overwhelming apprehension, fear, worry, and helplessness. That feeling can be crippling for us. When we worry, we are looking to control the situation and have a handle on the many “what if’s” of any given moment. Anxiety occurs when stressors around you cause you to feel small and those stressors to feel much bigger than yourself.
And it can paralyze you. But RemedyLIVE's licensed marriage and family therapist, Richele Groeneweg, suggests two critical things that will set you on the right path toward controlling the toxic thoughts and the anxiety that follows. It’s not a guaranteed fix, but it’s a step in the right direction.
Breathe.
The simplest way to calm our minds in these moments is to practice intentional breathing.
First, take a deep breath through your nose using only your abdomen. Hold it there for just a few seconds, and then. Slowly release that breath through your mouth. Doing this helps regulate the whole body. Taking these kinds of deep breaths allows you the time and space to take notice of your surroundings and let the anxiety your feeling become a valuable teacher.
As you take those breaths, your body is flooded with oxygen, which helps to reduce stress hormones such as cortisol and epinephrine. This helps to calm your body and mind, allowing you to think more clearly, and it can help to reduce physical symptoms of anxiety such as rapid heart rate and shallow breathing.
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Recognize it.
Think about the last time you felt anxious. Let’s assume you have an appointment or a big meeting at work and are trying to take control. You can remind yourself that being anxious or nervous about the meeting is okay. Still, you can properly prepare and focus on doing your absolute best. So instead of trying to eliminate the anxious thoughts, You can talk yourself through them. You can remind yourself that you have thoughts and feelings, but you are not your thoughts and feelings. You can also tell yourself that you can handle whatever comes your way and are strong enough to get through the meeting and any other challenges that may arise.
We all deal with anxious thoughts and feelings throughout our lives at different moments and for various reasons. While we may not be rid of them, we can certainly learn to navigate them successfully.