Crying is Necessary
About a week ago, I got an email that immediately caused me to cry. I am in grad school about 10 hours from home and thought I would only be home for about 3 weeks out of the next summer. I found out that I would probably be home for 2.5 months instead and the tears just started coming. I started laughing because it felt pretty unnecessary to shed tears over it, but upon more thought, I figured out it was more than just the email. Yes, I was relieved to hear that I would get to spend more time with my family, but I was also really stressed over the exams and projects I had been doing the past two weeks, and I was exhausted. All this put together, and I was uncontrollably crying. By the end, I felt so much better. Yes, I was still tired, my eyes were probably a little puffy, and my nose was running, but emotionally, I felt comforted. Crying is necessary! We like to say tears show weakness, but in fact, we need to cry sometimes.
There are three kinds of tears: reflex, continuous, and emotional. Reflex tears come when we’re around a lot of dirt, smoke, onions, etc. It’s our bodies’ way of protecting our eyes. Continuous tears are the way our body lubricates our eyes so they don’t dry up. They’re regularly produced. Emotional tears are what we are most familiar with. Emotional tears contain hormones and toxins created when we’re stressed, and tears are a way of releasing those hormones. Crying also releases endorphins, which are our bodies’ natural pain killer and helps us feel better. Crying helps us process what we’re going through (Orloff, 2010). When we repress this natural emotion, it often makes us feel worse.
I remember being in a particular relationship where I refused to cry. I thought crying showed weakness, and I couldn’t be weak. So, when I would start to feel emotional, I would leave. Obviously, this wasn’t a healthy way to express myself. After a conversation about why I responded in that way, I was able to stop running away. I cried in front of this person when I felt emotional. They were able to see how much whatever we were talking about was affecting me, and we could go from there. Crying actually connected us more. Showing our true emotions to others can help create more intimacy in a relationship and bond us to others. Sometimes I joke that once you’ve seen me ugly cry, you’re stuck with me.
Crying is not something we should be ashamed of. It’s part of how we were made to respond! It’s a healthy and natural part of life. If you feel the need to cry, do it. Allow your brain to release those hormones and help you feel better. Let’s change that societal expectation, one tear at a time.
Reference: Orloff, J. (2010). The health benefits of tears. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-freedom/201007/the-health-benefits-tears.
Challenges/Points:
Crying releases stress hormones and toxins from our bodies, while also creating endorphins.
Crying is our bodies’ natural way of processing what is going on in our lives, whether it be sad or happy.
Next time you feel those tears building up, let them flow instead of giving yourself a headache by repressing them.
Questions:
When was the last time you cried?
Do you often suppress your tears, or do you let them flow?
How do you feel after crying?
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