Some of us were raised to unleash a flurry of angry words no matter the consequences, so long as you apologize later. Others were raised to bottle the anger up. Don't say anything if you can't say anything nice. All the while, never really knowing that one day the bottle would burst. It's not wrong to be angry. But it is wrong to mistreat others in our anger. 

While you're in the midst of a prolonged period of clouds, rain, snow, cold, or all of the above, embrace it! This is your chance to get things done around the house. This could mean you do chores such as cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, or something else you’ve been putting off. It may mean you have to type out a few emails or knock out an essay for something. Whatever it is, make sure it’s productive. What will make you feel worse is if you sit around and do nothing all day.

Sometimes life purpose reminds me of messages in the kibble. The message is available but often we never discover the meaning. Fortunately, unlike the kibble code, we CAN decipher our inner calling. We just need to listen. I’ve found one of the best ways to hear my inner voice is deliberate silence. This can take practice, but it is worth the effort. 

I realized, during that stretch, the creative power of unplugging from phones, computers and television for periods of time. It seems like it should be the opposite. Removing all the inspiring artists and material from under our noses should be like unplugging a lamp from a light socket—an immediate loss of energy, but unplugging for a time triggered creativity. Out of the screen silence came new thoughts. I wanted to write, cook, create, and dream. And I don’t think it was a fluke.

It’s taken me years to slowly learn the names of the nature around me. The beautiful thing is that nature is always waiting for us to explore and know her! There are some beautiful, easy to use tree identification books you could probably find at your school or public library. They also make them for birds. Immersing ourselves into the natural world right outside our door is a deeply therapeutic exercise. The fact is that we are more invested in something when it has a name and is known.

The brain undergoes lots of development and change during the teen years. Introducing something like alcohol can lead to lasting consequences. When you drink, your hippocampus is immediately affected; however, drinking can have long-term effects too. Alcohol has the potential to damage or kill cells in the hippocampus, which helps with learning and memory.

I’m not sure that any musical has ever been written that better tells the story of how our present days, the small decisions we make moment to moment, shape history and become what we think of as the powerful past. Because really, that’s all the past is when you stop to think about it; a collection of moments and decisions that were made just like the one you’re making right now.

Having a relaxed stance, arms down or in an open position and a smile on your face, sends the message that you are inviting others to join you in a friendly conversation. Maintaining eye contact while talking lets the speaker know you are attentive to what they are sharing. Living in a pandemic, we all know that masks make it harder to feel a sense of vulnerability with others; but masked or not, being intentional about eye contact can help remove some of those barriers that make it harder to be authentic with others.

Let's be honest; 2020 was not the year we wished for. In fact, it's not even a year worthy of a do-over. I would much prefer to forget it ever happened. But if there was anything good, it was that I learned where to put my focus--on the things I actually do have control over. 

But it's his average-ness that I love about him. It's what makes him actually pretty great. Because I had the opportunity over the years to watch him thrive where so many of us get stuck--living in the average. Let's face it, average is what describes most of us. But my dad has made the most of every gift, talent, and treasure he has--no matter how big or small. 

Take a second and think about your day. Do you hit the ground running in the morning? Push yourself to the limit? Taking care of the kids, checking email, after-school activities, doing homework, stress about deadlines, and your determination to accomplish everything you put on your to-do list. Without warning, sleep turns into nothing more than a short reprieve between tasks rather than the necessary restoration your body and mind need.

Fact: For every good way of coping we might choose, there is an equally destructive or damaging way of coping we could turn to instead. We might turn to alcohol or drugs to numb the pain of a failed relationship instead of sitting with it and examining the part we played, or we might choose to cope with low self esteem by trying to be the best at everything instead of doing the hard inner work of changing what we believe about ourselves. Unfortunately, we can even use people as an unhealthy way of coping the same way that we can turn to people for healthy support, guidance, and love.

Using MRIs, researchers can figure out what part of our brain lights up when listening to music. What they’re seeing is that music is not just sent to one part of the brain. It actually affects most of our brain. Different parts of a song like rhythm and tone are analyzed in different parts of the brain. The part of our brain that processes emotions also lights up when listening to a song (McCollum 2019). 

In some ways, the divorce of a stepfamily is more complicated than the divorce of a biological family. There are legal requirements and visitation schedules that keep biological family members linked even after a divorce. That is not the case when it comes to stepfamily members. 

If you feel that you already have a close friend or two, that you have your community of people to support you, then try to be that for someone new. Not everyone is brave enough to take that first step. On the other side of that, we can’t wait for someone to make the first move either. The years and years that the people at this conference, and myself, felt so alone were because we kept waiting for someone else to extend the invitation. 

I’ve looked back at that day so many times over the years. In life, you can’t always prepare in advance for what the day will bring. Sometimes you find yourself at the top of a mountain and you have to figure out what to do. You need to put aside the fear and give it a try. Then comes the beautiful moment when you realize you can ski. Maybe not well, but you’re making progress. 

It sounds harsh. Trust me, it felt harsh. But they explained, “Only you can choose to make the right decisions for yourself each day. No one is going to call when you pick up that unhealthy snack and tell you to put it down. No one is going to text you to get out of bed in time for work, or to work out, or to make breakfast, or to read that book you’ve been wanting to. You have to make those decisions for yourself. Every day. No excuses. It’s only up to you.” 

Sometimes not working becomes the actual work. Sometimes resting is not as easy as it once was. But does that mean we give up? Not even a little. It means we remove the stigma of stopping, and we retrain our brains to remember the sheer joy of doing nothing. I know what you're thinking: "That's a lot easier said than done." Maybe that's true, but what prevents us from simply enjoying and appreciating doing nothing is that we allow our tasks to captivate our attention more than rest. 

One of my very favorite parts of Facebook is viewing my memories from years past. My old posts contain photos of my children when they were babies, friends from my college days, and written thoughts that highlight happy memories that I’ve made. They fill me with joy as I think about each day and see the history of my life unfold before me. 

What do all these songs have in common? Alcohol. I guarantee most of us hear someone talking or singing about drinking every day. It’s a huge part of American society. However, most of us also know that drinking is really not great for you, especially the kind of drinking these songs are talking about. What really happens in your brain while you drink alcohol?