It’s tempting to fall prey to the idea that it’s good to surround yourselves only with people who look like you, agree with your beliefs or your religion, or are in the same financial bracket as you, etc. That can feel good at first because it’s so easy. We like to see ourselves reflected in others, to have what we already think affirmed or find that we share interests or opinions with someone else. These are all natural ways of bonding. The trouble starts when we begin to exclude anyone who falls outside those cozy formulas.

Have you ever been in the middle of your own crisis when someone tried to lean on you for support or looked to you for their own guidance and emotional balance? If you’ve experienced this, then you know what the usual response is: a wide eyed, blank stare that essentially says: What?!? I can’t help you right now! I’m barely capable of helping myself! This is a far more common situation than you might imagine. For many, hardship and trials lead them to lean on anyone who happens to be close enough to grab, even if that person is up to their neck in their own problems. When this happens within families, it can lead to really explosive interactions!